I like this one from the ideal bartender by Tom bullock
A testimonial from the St. Louis Post-Dispatch which appeared in the
form of an editorial, Wednesday evening, May 28, 1913, at a time when
Col. Roosevelt was vindicating, by a libel suit, his reputation for
sobriety and temperance.
Colonel Roosevelt's fatal admission that he drank just a part of one
julep at the St. Louis Country Club will come very near losing his
case.
Who was ever known to drink just a part of one of Tom's? Tom, than
whom there is no greater mixologist of any race, color or condition
of servitude, was taught the art of the julep by no less than Marse
Lilburn G. McNair, the father of the julep. In fact, the very cup
that Col. Roosevelt drank it from belonged to Governor McNair, the
first Governor of Missouri, the great-grandfather of Marse Lilburn
and the great-great-grandfather of the julep.
As is well known, the Country Club mint originally sprang on the
slopes of Parnassus and was transplanted thence to the bosky banks
of Culpeper Creek, Gaines County, Ky., and thence to our own
environs; while the classic distillation with which Tom mingles it
to produce his chief d'oeuvre is the oft-quoted liquefied soul of a
Southern moonbeam falling aslant the dewy slopes of the Cumberland
Mountains.
To believe that a red-blooded man, and a true Colonel at that, ever
stopped with just a part of one of those refreshments which have
made St. Louis hospitality proverbial and become one of our most
distinctive genre institutions, is to strain credulity too far. Are
the Colonel's powers of self restraint altogether transcendent? Have
we found the living superman at last?
When the Colonel says that he consumed just a part of one he
doubtless meant that he did not swallow the Mint itself, munch the
ice and devour the very cup.
And this is a classic too....
My dear General Connor,
Your letter requesting my formula for mixing mint juleps leaves me in the
same position in which Captain Barber found himself when asked how he was able
to carve the image of an elephant from a block of wood. He replied that it was
a simple process consisting merely of whittling off the part that didn't look
like an elephant.
The preparation of the quintessence of gentlemanly beverages can be
described only in like terms. A mint julep is not the product of a FORMULA. It
is a CEREMONY and must be performed by a gentleman possessing a true sense of
the artistic, a deep reverence for the ingredients and a proper appreciation
of the occasion. It is a rite that must not be entrusted to a novice, a
statistician, nor a Yankee. It is a heritage of the old South, an emblem of
hospitality and a vehicle in which noble minds can travel together upon the
flower-strewn paths of happy and congenial thought.
So far as the mere mechanics of the operation are concerned, the
procedure, stripped of its ceremonial embellishments, can be described as
follows:
Go to a spring where cool, crystal-clear water bubbles from under a bank
of dew-washed ferns. In a consecrated vessel, dip up a little water at the
source. Follow the stream through its banks of green moss and wildflowers
until it broadens and trickles through beds of mint growing in aromatic
profusion and waving softly in the summer breezes. Gather the sweetest and
tenderest shoots and gently carry them home. Go to the sideboard and select a
decanter of Kentucky Bourbon, distilled by a master hand, mellowed with age
yet still vigorous and inspiring. An ancestral sugar bowl, a row of silver
goblets, some spoons and some ice and you are ready to start.
In a canvas bag, pound twice as much ice as you think you will need. Make
it fine as snow, keep it dry and do not allow it to degenerate into slush.
In each goblet, put a slightly heaping teaspoonful of granulated sugar,
barely cover this with spring water and slightly bruise one mint leaf into
this, leaving the spoon in the goblet. Then pour elixir from the decanter
until the goblets are about one-fourth full. Fill the goblets with snowy ice,
sprinkling in a small amount of sugar as you fill. Wipe the outsides of the
goblets dry and embellish copiously with mint.
Then comes the important and delicate operation of frosting. By proper
manipulation of the spoon, the ingredients are circulated and blended until
Nature, wishing to take a further hand and add another of its beautiful
phenomena, encrusts the whole in a glittering coat of white frost. Thus
harmoniously blended by the deft touches of a skilled hand, you have a
beverage eminently appropriate for honorable men and beautiful women.
When all is ready, assemble your guests on the porch or in the garden,
where the aroma of the juleps will rise Heavenward and make the birds sing.
Propose a worthy toast, raise the goblet to your lips, bury your nose in the
mint, inhale a deep breath of its fragrance and sip the nectar of the gods.
Being overcome by thirst, I can write no further.
Sincerely,
S.B. Buckner, Jr.
and i can't find the one about mixing the mint sugar and ice in one glass and
the whisky in another, discarding the mint sugar and ice and drinking the
whisky but i'm sure it's out there!
--
"Manners maketh the man, Bourbon, vermouth and bitters maketh the Manhattan"