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 Message 21620 of 22774 in Behind the Bar
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Subject: Re: Open a donut shop.
From: open a donut shop
Posted: Tue Feb 3. 2009, 00:44 UTC
Followup to: "Open up a donut shop."  by JackieAssman  (Sun Feb 1. 2009, 23:28 UTC)
> I needed to get your advice on some stuff.

okie dokie.. what kinda stuff..? :O O: :O
 
> What's the best way to go about lying your way into a bartending 
> job?

Can you be more specific please..?  I'm not very fond of vague post.  Here's a 
Vague answer:  Make a fake resume and apply at every possible establishment 
you can.  Ask your friends if they know anyone who bartenders, networking is 
seriously like the key to life.. hence "It's not what you know, its who you 
know" ... so be nice to everybody cos at some point you'll probably want their 
help.   Also, look on Craigslist.com and see if anyone is hiring, but whatever 
you do, Do not send your resume via email, always ask for the location of the 
bar, and go down there and apply in person.  If they email you back with some 
bull shit answer like "sorry we can't do that" then the place probably isn't 
right for you, try countering with "well I need to make sure the place fits my 
requirments before I just give you my resume.. that'd be a waste of both our 
time."

I still have a couple fake resumes on my computer from back in the day.. I can 
email you one if you'd like :D. 

If not, and you decide to write your own resume (which I always recommend for 
many obvious reasons) here are some tips:

The first key to lying on your resume is to list your references as friends 
and use their phone numbers.  Warn them ahead of time that you're doing this, 
especially if they have a custom voicemail that states their real name; if so 
they're gonna have to change it back to Default for two weeks.  You can also 
use your family members, but be sure to list them under an alias.. so if your 
name is "John Doe", you don't want to list "Jane Doe" as a reference... you'd 
change the last name to something like "Jane Rodriguez."  That way there is no 
connection that you are related to this person.

Example:
REFRENCES:
Max E. Pad - (YOUR FRIENDS PHONE NUMBER) - Bar Manager, Joshin Ya's Bar & Grill
Dixie Normous - (YOUR MUM'S PHONE NUMBER) - General Manager, Imah Lyon's Diner

Another trick (if you have multiple phone lines) is to use YOURSELF as a 
reference.. just make up a fake name, and list your phone number(s) as the 
reference contact number.  The ONE time a manager check my references, I had 
this scam going.  She called my house asking for "Jimmy Rodgriguez" and I 
immediately knew what was going on... I deepend my voice, and we had a short 
conversation of me basically telling her everything she wanted hear. 5 minutes 
and DONE.  Next day I was hired. Little did she know that it was actually me 
on the other line hyping things up!! :O O: :O

Second key is to list job experience from places similar to where you're 
applying at.  For instance, if you're applying at a night club, don't list 
"Digsy's Diner - a charming "hole in the wall" establishment with an 
atmosphere similar to the pub from Cheers." as your most recent work 
experience... list something like "Razzel's Night Club - very high volume club 
located in the heart of Ft. Lauderdale, Florida.  A popular destination 
amongst tourist as well as locals" 

So to summarize,
If you're applying at:
Restaurant - List mostly restaurant experience
Night club - list mostly night club experience
Pub - List mostly pub expierence
Airport - airport expierence... 
etc.. etc........

WARNING:  during your interview, Management will 100% of the time ask you, 
"So, why did you leave your last job" ...  BE PREPARED.  Never tell them you 
were fired, and never, EVER, tell them you left because of some negative 
factor. (i.e. "i hated my co-workers" , "my boss was a cunt") A good answer 
would be something like "I left my previous job because I feel like I have 
outgrown it, It became too easy, I thrive on challenging myself." ;)

k thats it for now, Sorry for any spelling//gramatical errors, I'm writing 
this post half asleep, I'm gonna go take a nap with the babe now... 

Oh btw, If you end up writing your own resume, check out these links for help
- http://www.jeffreymorgenthaler.com/2006/how-to-write-a-bartending-resume/
- http://www.misscharming.com/CustomBartenderTips.pdf  (PDF FILE)

> I'd appreciate anything.

yeah, np man.. I know how it is stressing to find a job and being new in the 
business.. I know it's hard to believe, but EVERYONE has been there, and 
everyone has to pay their dues and go thru it.. But Just remember, It's not 
really the resume that gets you the job.  It is your attitude and how well you 
present (sell) yourself to the managers from the moment you meet, to the day 
your hired.  Clean, Professional, upbeat, and slightly cocky has never let me 
down.  The most important thing about your resume is it being gramatically 
correct.. and thats it.

Lastly, are you prepared...? Knowledge wise I that is..?  Read this 
post/thread:
[open a donut shop] Re: Starting Out?
before you do anything.  DO NOT apply for a job until you have atleast some 
what of a clue to what you're doing.  I know you can't afford bar school so 
you're probably in a rush to get hired and start making some money, but trust 
me on this, LEARN THE BASICS.  Cos if you don't, you're just going to get 
yourself fired.. and then you'll have wasted all that time, and still be 
broke.  If you need quick money, go to craigslist.com and look under the 
"gigs" section.. they have a lot of daily labor that pays like $50 for helping 
someone move furniture or a fish tank or something...  And if you're a girl 
you could always Strip for a week or two.. I know a few club owners and 
they're always looking for new girls.  Pays Great too, More than you'll ever 
make bartending.  And lastly, although I don't recommend it, you can sell 
drugs temporarily.  I remember when I was 18 I got in a car accident and 
needed to come up with money FAST.  I got to talking to some people and before 
I knew it I turned $200 into $12K in two months just wandering around my 
college campus selling weed/vicodin/coke/e-pills.  But Beware, the money is 
EXTREMELY ADDICTIVE... and sooner or later YOU WILL GET CAUGHT.  the key is to 
just Get in and Get out as fast as you can, before anyone can pinpoint you.  I 
know its a really shady thing to do...but I was not dropping out of college to 
work two jobs to pay some fat whore insurance money.  If you have a conscience 
problem with it, read this: ( 
[open a donut shop] Alcohol vs. Marijuana..  Alcohol = worse. ) .. it might help.   
I've been down on my luck before (I'm sure we all have at some point), and I 
did what I had to do.  I'm not sure how serious your situation is, but you'll 
do the same...  Act accordinally.

p.s.
next time you call someone out looking for advice, you really should make an 
attempt to spell their name correctly...  However, I suppose I had it coming 
back to me sooner or later :O O: :O (See: 
[open a donut shop] Re: The $#!t has hit the fan for me, as a service tender, help! )


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