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 Message 1843 of 1991 in Flair Bartending
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Subject: Vagina Monologue
From: Captain Catharsis
Posted: Tue May 15. 2007, 07:20 UTC
I am poisoned and tormented by its throbbing, pulsating wetness! Such wetness, 
which invades my dreams, turning them into nightmares from whence I do not 
want to be waken from!

How could such a goddess sounding name reek of pain, sorrow and suffering?

Are we not men? Don't we have the balls to prove it? What makes us all act 
foolishly despite ourselves? Why are we the horny bastards we are??

One word, my dear friends, my fellow erectioners: WOMAN!

Woman! An insane drug that affects the very core of our lives! Of men's lives! 
Of my life!

I am witness to it all, my brothers. How many friends and fellow men must we 
lose to the wiles of breasts and curves? How many must be devoured whole by 
the evil of clitorises and nipples?

Why can we not be like the humble amoeba, that creature which is the epitome 
of oneness? A creature capable of saying "I don't need sex" with a straight 
face, and with no one to prove it wrong. Why can we not do the same and get 
away with it?!

They are whole, they need only themselves! Not some blasphemous bitch who 
would go through men like they do panties.

To be one... Not two... But one is the very essence of their life.

So my dear hardened friends, remember: Be an amoeba of society!


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